Lukas stumbled back a bit when Marcus hugged him, but he laughed, the huge smile on his face never faltering. He wrapped his arms around the shorter boy, lifting him up slightly. He breathed in deeply, taking in Marcus’ scent.
Woodchips and cinnamon.
Without pulling away from the hug, Lukas spoke, whispering in Marcus’ ear. “What does that mean for us, then?” He asked. Were they dating now?
When Lukas asked him what they were, that made Marcus confused for an odd reason. Did he really want to rush into another relationship? Sure they’ve been talking for a long while now, and they’ve gotten to know each other pretty well, but were they ready for that kind of relationship?
The word was distant for him, he hadn’t had one for a long time. Their had been a long break with guys ever since Allison and Skyler came a long, and with both of them, well, he had troubles in both relationships. They both saw his dark side, and he didn’t want Lukas to see that side of him.
"Boyfriends," he mindlessly answered him in a hushed whisper, and he tightened his grip onto the taller male. No turning back now.
|Anonymous asked: Anon of the week: Besides your mother, who do you miss most?|
I really miss Jared, honestly, but I don’t think I’ll ever see him again so.
No use in crying over the past.
Warmth spread throughout Lukas’ body as Marcus kissed him back, and he smiled into the kiss. He felt his cheeks get hot, turning a pink color. Marcus’ arms were wrapped around Lukas’ torso, and Lukas had his hands on the shorter boys cheeks.
Marcus pulled away first, and Lukas let out a nervous laugh. He really just kissed Marcus! Again! He grinned widely, his cheeks still burning. He met Marcus’ gaze, then looked at the floor, taking a deep breath. He was going to tell him. He had nothing to lose.
"I- I, like y- you, Marcus…" He stuttered, hesitantly meeting Marcus’ gaze.
Marcus couldn’t breath when Lukas stuttered out that he liked him. He felt like he was screaming, but he knew he wasn’t. The grin on Lukas’ face seemed to be contagious, because Marcus couldn’t stop smiling.
Lukas liked him.
Marcus snapped out of his gaze and brought Lukas to him again, wrapping his arms around the male and engulfing him into a hug. He buried his head into his shoulder, and smiled wider. “I like you too, a lot,” Marcus breathed out, closing his eyes as he stayed close to the blonde.
They both likes each other. The news was enough to make Marcus jump with joy and giggle because he couldn’t contain his excitement, but he stayed calm against him; he didn’t want to freak him out.
The look in Marcus’ eyes made Lukas’ heart sink. He looked as though Lukas had just broken his heart. Did Marcus like him? Did Lukas like Marcus? He wasn’t sure. He wanted to like Marcus, he did. But, something was holding him back. Was it his religion? Was it that constant reminder of what he had with Allison?
He listened to Marcus speak, and Lukas shook his head. “No,” He said, shaking his head again. “Marcus, wait.” Was he really going to do this? He stepped toward Marcus, grabbing his wrist before he reached the front door.
He turned Marcus to make him face Lukas, and looked into his eyes. “Don’t go,” He whispered, bringing his had to Marcus’ warm cheek. He was going to do this. He leaned forward, and pressed his lips to Marcus’, his eyes fluttering shut. He did not pull away a second after, but he kept his lips on his, moving them against the smaller boy’s slowly.
Marcus was stopped by Lukas grabbing his wrist, and Marcus let out a groan. He didn’t have time for this, he just wanted to go home. But when Lukas turned him around, and brought his hand up to his cheek, Marcus looked at him with furrowed eyebrows. He didn’t know why he was doing this, he thought that Lukas didn’t want anything to do with him. His oh was what convinced him that they weren’t going to be together.
Then he could feel a pair of soft lips touching his, and it took Marcus’ breath away. His eyes fluttered shut, and he slowly moved his lips against the blondes. He moved his arm around to wrap it around Lukas’ body, feeling his knees go weak. Marcus had support, holding onto Lukas as he kissed him.
The kiss was great, but Marcus had to pull back, more confused than ever. He ran a hand through his hair and looked at Lukas in the eyes, “Now we have to talk about that.”
"No, I don’t." Lukas answered truthfully to Marcus’ question. He felt bad, but he really had no idea what he was talking about, The silence fell over them, and Lukas stared at the floor, running his toes along the floor as he did. He looked up at Marcus as he spoke.
When Marcus started ranting. Lukas stared at him in awe. His brows furrowed as he kept calling him stupid. Marcus was still smiling while insulting him. Lukas stared at Marcus with a mixture of awe, and worry. Was he alright?
His bright blue eyes bore into Marcus’ dark blue ones, and he felt a blush creep to his cheeks. His mind flashed back to that night, when Marcus had comforted him at the cemetery at Allison’s grave. And when Marcus had walked him home, Lukas had kissed him and sprinted inside. He was trying to suppress that memory; it made him feel dirty, like a sinner.
He wasn’t sure what to say, so he just stared at Marcus, waiting for him to say something else.
The word hung in the air like smoke, closing Marcus’ throat and choking him with undeniable regret. He shouldn’t have brought it up, because now Lukas was just standing their silent, looking at him and Marcus couldn’t bear to think about anything else. Oh. He kissed him and all he could say was Oh. He left Marcus wondering if he liked him, if they could have some future together and all he could fucking say was Oh.
Marcus turned around, breaking the gaze between the two of them. He couldn’t deny that there were tears forming on the brinks of his eye lids, and that he wished Lukas would just come to him and hold him, tell him that he wanted to kiss him again like Marcus wanted, but all he got instead of that is Oh.
He let his eyes close, and he felt an overwhelming sense of dread pour into his body. He was tired, and he wanted to leave the males house to go back to his and sleep the day away. Marcus just felt done.
"Well, goodnight I guess," he muttered up, and began to walk to the front door, "Sorry for waking you up, yeah."
When Marcus spoke, Lukas grew nervous. Why was he mad? What did Lukas do? He furrowed his brows at Marcus. This wasn’t making sense. Marcus was saying how angry he was, but he was still smiling.
"What are you talking about? What do we need to talk about?" Lukas asked in a confused tone. He had his arms crossed over his chest, and his eyebrows furrowed. "No, I don’t know what you’re talking about!" Lukas said, throwing his arms out to his sides.
His jaw dropped a bit when Marcus said he hated him, and he scoffed a bit. “Marcus, you’re not making any sense!” He cried, genuinely confused. Was this a joke?
When Lukas said he didn’t know what he was talking about, Marcus felt all of his anger leave his body. He was right, he didn’t know why he was angry. He forgot about the kiss, or it wasn’t important enough for him to remember it. Marcus let out a sigh and walked over to Lukas, “Of course I’m not making sense, because its midnight, I’m sorry but do you really not understand why you’re pissing me off?” He couldn’t believe that Lukas didn’t know.
A couple seconds passed, and neither of them spoke. He didn’t know. He really didn’t know. Marcus looked away from the blonde and started ranting, “I can’t believe that you don’t know what I’m taking about. Especially because it was you who did it, and left me thinking about it all the god damn time, while you just live your stupid life with your stupid face and your stupid grin and your stupid- your stupid,” he paused for a quick second, “Your stupid you not thinking about it at all.”
Marcus was out a breath, and he breathed some in before he looked at Lukas in the eyes. “You kissed me, Lukas, and thats all that I’ve been thinking about for the past weeks.”
Sleep was no longer familiar to Lukas. Ever since Allison died, he just couldn’t get himself to sleep. Maybe it was because he wasn’t used to not having her in the house. Maybe it was because of the constant guilt that was eating him alive.
He didn’t know.
He laid on his back on his bed, staring up at the ceiling whilst curled up under his covers. He was actually growing a bit tired tonight, and he hoped he would actually get some sleep for the first time in weeks. He turned onto his side, snuggling into his pillow, his eyelids growing heavier by the second. His eyes drifted shut, and he could feel sleep taking over.
Just as he was about to escape into his dreams for the first time in a while, there was a loud banging in his front door. He gasped loudly, and fell of his bed, hitting the floor hard. He grew scared, remembering he was the only one home. The fear quickly faded when he heard Marcus’ voice on the other side. He smiled widely, and got up from the floor, rushing down the stairs, tripping on his way down.
He turned on the hall light, and opened the front door, revealing Marcus on the other side, grinning widely. “Marcus? What are you doing? It’s like midnight!” Lukas said, laughing after he spoke.
When Marcus heard noises coming from inside the house, he knew that Lukas had to be awake. He smirked at that, and then when the door opened to Lukas in his Snowman pajamas, rage fueled inside of him.
"You’re making me angry!" Marcus stepped close to Lukas, entering his house as he pointed his finger at him. He shut the door behind him and let out a sigh. "We’re not talking about something we need to talk about, and you’re putting it off and its making me angry!"
He turned around and started walking further into the males house, “I bet you don’t even know what I’m talking about.” Marcus looked back at Lukas, and laughed, “I hate you!”
He was probably sending mixed signals. He was saying hurtful things, making it clear that he was angry, but he was saying it with a smile because whenever he saw Lukas he just made him smile like a god damn idiot.
Marcus hadn’t slept in days. He figured it was just the nerves of him wanting so badly to talk to Lukas about the kiss they shared, on the night they met at a graveyard. Marcus covered his face with his hands, and started giggling as he continued to lay spread across his bed. This always happened around this time, 12:04 A.M. When it was getting to be the next day. he couldn’t help but think about Lukas with his stupid hair, his stupid face, his stupid grin and his stupid retarded cheeks.
It was driving him crazy as everyday passed and he didn’t know how the blonde felt about him. Whenever they were together, neither of them even brought up the kiss and it seemed like Lukas wanted nothing to do with it. But Marcus knew better than that, he’d always catch him looking at him with those loving blue eyes and then they’d both blush and turn away.
Marcus wanted to punch him, for not doing anything. He was older for gods sake, and he should’ve done something by now. Marcus sat up in his bed, looking around the room. If Lukas didn’t do something in thirty seconds, he’d have to himself.
Silence past for thirty seconds.
Marcus got out of his bed, anger filled within him, as he put on his largest jacket and sweats. Warmth covered his body, and he ran down the stairs. He stopped at the entrance and put on his shoes before he left his house. He ran across the street, to the males house and walked up the pathway to the Hill’s household. Once he was at the door, he knocked on it as loud as he could, aware that his parents were out of town.
"Lukas Hills, you son of a bitch, open this door right now!" He yelled out loud with a big grin on his face. He never thought he’d be doing this.
|Anonymous asked: Anon of the Week: If you could change one thing in your life, what would it be?|
My moms death.
That seemed to be the root of my problems, if she never died.. I’d be completely different.